Asako Kudo-Markert, Devon's Step-Mother

I want to share my memories about Devon.

The first time I met Devon was at a soccer field. She was 16 years old. It was in the fall of 1996. I had just come from Japan to begin working on my master’s at Fresno State to become a psychotherapist. Devon immediately accepted me as her dad’s girlfriend and welcomed me. We lived together 1.5 years, mostly during her senior year in high school. She was always active and having fun with her friends. Her daily life was filled with friends and activities. She came home from school, had her friends over or went out with them, or she studied, went for running, or relaxed in her room. She was also a very good student and efficient in her studies. I remember that she didn’t want to do swimming in the PE class because the chlorine turned her hair green. When I cooked, she said, “Eeh!” to seaweed and Japanese food, but loved my blueberry cheesecake. One day Devon began screaming, “Daddy! A storm came to my room!” Then, her dad vacuumed her room. After that, I could finally see the pink carpet on the floor. I had many culture shocks, including having the big dog Morticai sleeping on devon’s bed and seeing Devon making a green or purple color cake, but it was fun. I wish I could have spoken English then like I do now so we could have more conversations.

I remember our short trips. Once Lou, me, Devon and Stephanie went horseback riding in the mountains above Huntington Lake. Another time we camped out at Yosemite. The girls hiked up Half Dome. At night a raccoon tried to steal Devon’s backpack. When she was graduating from high school, she and I went downtown in Fresno to choose a dress for her prom. Lou and I attended a special dinner for Honor Students at her high school. I am glad that I was able to be a substitute mom for her while Di was working hard in LA.

When Devon went to Santa Barbara, she totally enjoyed her life there. She was blossoming into a talented, attractive and extroverted woman. She traveled all over the world, making friends everywhere. She loved people and people loved her. She learned life skills from her friends, particularly Tonya, who became her roommate and confidante and greatest role model.

In 2002 my brother was married in Japan and my mom invited Dev to the wedding as a gift for her graduation. At that time she was in Spain finishing up her school. My family loved Devon and she enjoyed Japan. She wore a traditional kimono and looked very beautiful. She also experienced a tea ceremony at my friend’s home. This was particularly special because very few homes have a tea room. She enjoyed traditional Japanese food, but didn’t say, “Eeh!” this time. One day she took a picture of a public toilet in Tokyo. It had a button to make a flashing noise to disguise the natural sounds of our going to the bathroom. She was impressed how sensitive Japanese were to each other, even in the toilet. We shared a lot of fun and many funny moments like these during our two week vacation in Japan.

At their wedding party, Devon and Noureddin looked very happy. They developed their friendship and deepened their love in Long Beach. She became an excellent ESL teacher. One of my Japanese friends was her student and always told me how efficient and wonderful Devon was as a teacher. I knew she was capable and was very proud of her.

Devon was a wonderful step-daughter to me. I felt that I was like her step-mom/big sis/aunt/friend. I wasn’t sure who I was for her but it didn’t matter. We had a good relationship. She was definitely my family. She will be missed forever. When I saw a young girl wearing new style pants, I caught myself thinking like, “Oh, this might be good on Dev.” Then I felt very sad that I don’t have her any more. We have to keep our life without her, not just living but living fully and alive because this is also what Devon would want us to do. Devon, thank you for being my step-daughter.

I also want to say a special thanks to Devon’s co-workers, Karla, Portia and John, and all the teachers and staff at Torrance Unified School District, for all that they did during Devon’s illness. Also, a special thanks to all her and Noureddin’s friends for all you’ve done to make Devon happy during this past year and a half. Because of all of you, Devon was able survive and enjoy her life. And last, a special thanks to Tonya, Stephanie and Christian for organizing and coordinating Devon’s memorial service. Devon left her will, asking them to do so because she was concerned that Noureddin and the parents would be too grieving. She was right…again! Devon must be very grateful and proud of you guys.

Thank you so much.